As a member of the evangelical church and a young wife and mother, people always ask both my husband and me about our decision on early marriage. So those who are also interested in this, you’re more than welcome to join!
So, why do Evangelicals marry so young? Evangelicals place a high value on marriage as the legal context for sexuality and childbearing—which encourages earlier unions. As stated in the Bible, “But if they did not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.” – Corinthians 7:9.
Now let me explain this. The apostille tells that at that period, it was suitable for Christians to keep themselves single. Still, the marriage is settled by Divine wisdom, and those who can’t control their passion should instead marry than burn with the flame of lust. It leaves everyone the liberty to serve Him in the most suited way. This should be a moral orienteer again as our society starts to go down the path of lust.
A lot of people would think that getting married young is reckless and has lots of downsides, but I’m going to tell you about the benefits of early marriage. Keep reading if you want to find out everything about it from someone who has a first-hand experience!
The Benefits Of Getting Married Young
1. You Learn How to Be Responsible
This is probably the biggest one, and also the hardest. I won’t deny, getting married early isn’t that easy peasy lemon squeezy, and you need to work on yourself a lot (together with your partner, of course). But this is not something I regret. As for me, this marriage was an opportunity to not only test myself but to also test my faith.
Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife and the two shall become one flesh? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate. – Matthew 19:6
This passage says straight away that there is no such option as a divorce. Therefore, marriage was a risky step (considering how many people get divorced after marrying early), but I didn’t have any reason to doubt my husband. We learned how to make compromises, settle problems, and divide the duties together, and it helped us mature on our way. Maybe I’m very self-confident, but I think my husband and I are more responsible than other young people of our age.
2. You Grow As A Person
I have already mentioned this, but still, this point deserves its own paragraph. It’s been noted that getting together with somebody is way harder when you’re in your early 30s rather than early 20s. It is because when you’re 30, each one of you has been living individually for way too long, and it is tough to accept somebody else for who they are.
However, when you’re still in your early 20s, you’re able to adjust faster as the brain is still in the process of development. You learn how to live with your husband or wife, because you see them daily, and work on the relationship together every day as well. Your brain gets used to this style of life, which means you’re more likely to stay together for a long time.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not trying to say it is impossible to find a life-long partner when you’ve passed the 30s mark. It is still possible to get over your habit of independent living and settle down with somebody else, but in my opinion, it is much harder.
3. It’ll Be Easy for You To Have Healthy Kids
There’s a recent trend in the society to delay having children in order to fulfill the dreams and potential, start the career, etc. There’s definitely nothing wrong with it, to each one it’s own, but no one can deny the biological clock men and women have. The earlier you have kids, the higher chances you have of them being healthy and happy.
What’s more important, the younger you are, the easier it is to conceive a child. Not only that, but it is also easier to raise the kids. When you’re in your early 20s, you still have lots of energy, and your body finds different ways to deal with the sleep deprivation or other exhaustion. I’m glad I had the kids early because I had a little more energy to spare when they were little.
Plus, if you have kids relatively early, you can easily keep up with them, and their interests as your age difference won’t be very significant.
Don’t think I’m trying to say one parent group is better than another, but it’s just simpler for the younger parents to be on the same wavelength with their kids compared to the older ones.
4. It’s Very Hard to Manage the Family, Career, And Kids At The Same Time
The majority of people put off marriage in order to take care of their educational and career goals. However, this is not a very good idea. When you turn 30, you need to simultaneously manage everything, starting with a job and finishing with the kids. It is way more stressful as you’re not used to this style of life.
If you decide to get married in your 30s, you won’t be able to enjoy your marriage. As soon as you enter the contract, you’ll have to conceive kids in order to keep up with your biological clock. Because of that, you won’t have a lot of child-free time with your wife. You’ll have to adjust to a new person in your life, a lifestyle with a baby, and manage the career at the same time. No wonder it’ll cause lots of stress!
So, in my opinion, it is way easier to do everything gradually and not all at once. I got married when I was seventeen, and both my husband and I had our ups and downs. It’s not always easy, but neither of us has ever regretted this decision.
Is It Hard To Get On Well With Your Partner?
Honestly, when my husband and I just started living together, it felt almost impossible at first. We got used to certain ways of life and had to change them in order to be with each other.
We were fighting almost every week, but as soon as we were able to make progress on our journey, it became easier and less stressful.
Now, as we adapted to each other, it feels like we’re glued together, as I can’t imagine my life without him. And as time keep going, our love for each other only grows, and I hope this is something you will or already experience.
I also want to mention that I prayed a lot as I needed Lord’s help to get through this, and I think not only He helped us with dealing with our problems, but also strengthened our faith.
If you want to live a life that is worthwhile and honoring to God, you need to think Biblically, as becoming a wife/husband and a parent are huge aspects of it. However, I’m not trying to say everyone should follow the same path and marry as soon as they have this opportunity. Of course, an early marriage (or marriage in general) doesn’t work for everyone, so if this isn’t something you want, you should stay single in order to avoid lustful sins until you meet the right person.
If you are interested in learning about other Religions in the world, then check out this book on World’s Religions on Amazon.