Obviously, we go to school to learn, but what if we fall in love with someone over there? Dating in high school can lead to great romance, and love, even if it’s young. When teens come to high school they meet other students and they start to mature as they age. If you’re not sure if you’re ready for a high school relationship then I will help you look at some of the pros and cons of high school dating and whether it makes sense to get a boyfriend or girlfriend as a 9th-grade freshman, 10th-grade sophomore, 11th-grade junior or 12th-grade high school senior. I have realized that there are some things that are really fun and some things that are not so fun. Pros and Cons about dating in middle school you can read HERE. I can honestly say that being in a relationship in high school had both pros and cons, so let’s see some.
The Pros For Dating in High School
1. Dating Can Be a Positive Experience
Being in a relationship teaches you new things and makes you more mature. Having a girlfriend or boyfriend can offer a different perspective on the high school experience. In those years many guys in relationships are excited that their girlfriends have gotten them to try new things. When you first get out of this comfort zone, exciting new things come to your life which create memories that will last a lifetime. Also, for the first time in life you face the fact that you get to know a person completely inside out. Such things can be carved into a lifelong memory, and could potentially be some of the best high school memories.
2. Get to Know the Opposite Sex
Trying to understand the opposite sex can be one of the most frustrating of life’s experiences. The most common questions teens are wondering what’s going on inside the heart of a guy, or guys wondering the same about girls. When you are very young, you do not think about a lot of things, especially things like trying to generally understand the opposite sex. (Why are girls crying even when everything is okay? Why do not young men know how they feel?). In any case, it is important to strive to understand the opposite sex, as you will sooner or later need that in life. There is little opportunity to actually talk to girls, and a good number of people need the practice, and why just not start with that in high school. This is one of the very good reasons why it would be useful to get in relationship with someone in high school.
3. Get to Know What kind of Girl/Boy is Your Type
There are all sorts of types of girls and boys in this world, and pretty much every one of them is someone’s type. So when you start dating in high school you discover lots of new things about girls and boys at the earliest age which will be of benefit to you. There are several types of persons like: the Playgirl, nerd, motherly, feminine, adventurous and ambitious. You will not encounter all of them probably, but you will get a much better look to know what type you want. Of course you will not know until the middle of your 20s what type you want but it will be a good indicator.
4. Maturation
Teens may mature into a more socially competent, experienced, and functional adults. One of the benefits of this is that spending time with a boyfriend or girlfriend is fun. Also having a girlfriend or boyfriend makes you feel older and cooler which also encourages you to think differently. Sometimes maturation can be a tricky thing, but it’s a part that must be passed sooner or later in your life. Intellectually, teens today are exposed to and consume more information than earlier generations. In many ways they have been forced to grow up too quickly. During adolescence many teenagers rebel because they want more independence and control in their lives, and relationship exactly help in that.
5. Self-discovery and Behaviour
Dating could help them determine what they like about it and what activities they like doing when accompanied by another person. A study was performed at the University of Texas and researchers found that teens who had a girlfriend or boyfriend were less likely to engage in delinquent or dangerous behaviours when compared to teens without a partner. This can be useful because it stimulates creativity in that age. In addition, dating in high school can teach you a lot about yourself. You can learn if you like being in a relationship, gender preference, or if you just want to focus on school.
6. Having a Prom Date
Going to the prom is a major social milestone in the lives of many girls. Having a relationship is especially beneficial during high school because of prom season. It’s always nice to have a special romance to dance with at a special occasion like prom. A lot of high school students say the prom night is one of the best events throughout the high school. There are also memories that which you will remember all your life, and it would be a shame that you do not have some partner to make that night a special. Whoever you end up going with, you’re going to have a great time.
If you want to learn more about winning your love or sympathy, this is a book I recommend for those over 18 years of age: Getting the Love You Want
The Cons for Dating in High School
1. Super Busy in High School
Despite these advantages, there are still multiple drawbacks to having a romance in high school, a busy schedule is one of them. Students should not be so busy that they can’t get enough sleep each night. Lack of sleep is linked to not only poor academic performance but even depression and weight gain. Try to organise time better because you will need it the most during the high school. This is what I’m telling you from my own experience because I know how difficult it is to match all these things.
2. Breakups
When we talk about high school breakups, they are worst for multiple reasons. One of the reason is that you’ll still have chance to see your ex in the halls, or they could even be in your classes, which is quite inconvenient. Also a thing that is almost impossible to avoid is to hear her name pop up in a conversation when you don’t want to hear it. We can say that there are still some reasons why it is awkward, but these are the most common ones you will encounter during the high school. In general, going through any breakup is painful. Especially in the teenage years while you go to high school you’re fragile, you’re young, and you have powerful hormones and emotions. This is a good indicator that a breakup in high school might be even more painful than one later in life.
3. With Relationship Comes Drama
Once you have the girl in your life, things get a little complicated, especially in high school. Girls are more susceptible to crave drama and intensity in their relationships. When we say drama, I don’t mean drama like big fights all the time necessarily but girls crave intensity in their relationships. Emotional intensity and if you don’t give them that drama and intensity, though often times find a way to create it. The 99% of the time, teens have a fantastic low drama relationship because girls know 100% how you feel. Some girls lose interest or start pulling away from a guy when they know that you love them because the drama Is over. Girls are addicted to being chased. But grades at high school are also creating extra drama, with which high school students can barely handle.
4. Wastes of Money
We all know that in high school the only money we get from our parents is money for lunch. As far as money is concerned, it really depends on the financial situation of the parents, but most parents today do not have “extra money” to give their teens to spend it as they wish. Another disadvantage is that you do not have the time to do some extra job and earn some money for yourself, because the school itself takes you away too much time. Therefore, the money you make or your parents give is always more useful to spend on yourself and the things you really love at that age. Be grateful to those years because these are the best years of life.
5. Your Friendship Will Become Toxic
Tel Aviv University made a very interesting discovery in their 2018 study. Only 50% of the people we consider friends think the same thing in return. You are the one who initiates your meetings sometimes, and if you spend your time on your girlfriend or boyfriend, you will not be able to do it and it will be seen. They will see through time that you are not interested, and why would they then associate with such people like you? Toxic signs are revealed only from time to time. High school is itself difficult, and the acquisition of friends lasts for years. My advice is to hold to your true friends and dedicate your time to them because they will always be there for you.
6. Teens are Selfish
Teens are selfish. And by that I don’t mean it in the way that they want everything because they’re brats. I mean it in the way that they want everything because they can’t help it, and this is mostly related to things they care about, like a relationship. When these emotions carry you on, especially in teenage age, teens do not think about how the other person feels but they look at how they feel. Such things can emotionally hit the other person with whom they are in relationship with. Recent research on this topic has shown that due to hormonal changes, it is developmentally normal for teenagers to go through a self-absorbed or self-centered stage. The brain process that makes teenagers selfish and self-centred is also the part which boosts their ability to learn.
7. It Waste Time
We all know that in high school we do not have a lot of time, especially if you add a relationship into it. Many high school teens want a girlfriend/boyfriend and they think it would be fun, but in reality it is just not worth it. Having a relationship demands attention and time. But with all the responsibilities you have in high school such as homework’s, sport and your friends it is difficult to align everything. No one wants their relationship to fail, so you have to take some steps which require time to maintain it. I think there is nothing more to do about this, but to consider carefully whether you want this or not. And time during the high school can be used very well if you are creative.
8. Age Difference
Although it does not make a lot of difference, during the high school every year makes a huge difference. So one thing about high school relationships is that you must pay attention is age gaps. Here it is not just about the differences in the years where younger students are immature than the older ones, but the concern is that sometimes older students can take advantage of a younger students. Also sometimes the older student is too mature for the younger one, which can lead to issues in the relationship same as in adults. If that relationship persists and there is age gap between that two, distance and time can be issues when one student graduates and goes to college or move away. I do not believe that in those years distance relationships can be sustained or survived, because we’re too emotional in those age.
9. Possible Pregnancy
This is also one of the problems though you think that this can not happen to you during the high school. Despite teen pregnancies being at an all time low according to cdc.gov, a high school pregnancy is always a possibility when you are in the relationship. Boys sometimes demand from a girlfriend to have sex although they are not ready at that age because their environment imposes them. I do not think that in those years, neither party is mature or able to enter sexual relations, but it is difficult to forbid if you are already in the relationship. Do not rush anywhere, I know this is easier to say than do but be patient.
Conclusion:
When we look at all of this, having your first love in high school is exciting. Dating in high school comes with great benefits and experience as we have seen in this article. But looking at the overall picture, there is also risks and possible downsides as well. According to some research, it doesn’t matter who you date first, but it does matter who you love first when it comes to building an enduring relationship. Whatever path you choose from this 2, the good and bad sides will teach us important lessons for the life that is waiting for us. Still, we all need to find out what we think is best for us, and just take caution when it comes to high school relationships. If you have some of your experiences that you would like to share from high school, feel free to leave a comment below. Pros and Cons about Dating in Middle School you can read HERE.
Learn More
If you are interested in learning more about dating, then consider checking out this book about dating on Amazon.