A student and teacher have a relationship. This is one of the greatest fantasies that every high school student has. We all wondered sometimes about how it would be to date your teacher after high school, and is it legal. Can such relationships succeed, and for how long? There is also a question how long should we wait for it to be publicly acceptable? I will try to answer that question with my own experience.

Can you date your high school teacher after you graduate? You can date your teacher, but it is a tricky thing to do. Viewed from the teacher side, it is certainly unprofessional in many instances. There is, often rightfully, a stigma attached to it. Such relationships can survive, but the biggest factor is how much the age difference is between Teacher and the ex student.

I don’t think that any state can prevent such a relationship immediately after your graduation and adulthood. When you look, this is not really a ‘legal’ question. It’s an issue where the teacher needs to assess how the presentation of him dating a former student could create some administrative concerns. We have already established that it’s perfectly legal, but there is also a possibility that when certain administrators catch wind of the relationship, they may want to take a much closer look at his teaching record with an eye toward severe scrutiny, which can be very stressful for a longer period of time. Also if you are interested Are College Students Allowed to Date Professors, you can read it HERE.

Possible Consequences Dating a Teacher After Graduation

It’s known that in many countries, it is illegal for a teacher to date with a student, no matter their age. But what after graduation, when it becomes legally? What kind of consequences can happen? let’s explain. Let’s say it’s a case where you have an older teacher (around 40–50), and he is dating an 18-year-old woman, there will be sideways glances, comments, and plenty of gossip etc. We can say for sure, that there is a double standard when genders are reversed, but it is still stigmatized. In other case where we have a brand new teacher (for example: 22 years old), and she is dating an 18-year-old, there is much less of a stigma. But it still exists.

There are some things like this drops off, but that point stems more from the age of the former student. As an example, if a 30-year-old ex student dates a 40-year old teacher, I don’t think anyone would say much about it and I doubt there would be any problems about that. Such types of pair are considered and seen more as equals. Therefore, the most important fact about this is the difference between teacher and the ex student age and whether it is acceptable.

Is it OK to Fall in Love With Your Teacher?

Basically, your teacher cannot fall in love with you. If for some reason s/he does, then they are failing in their duties of being a teacher. From a moral point of view, it’s important to realize that your teacher has a responsibility – not just to you, but to all the other students, that s/he must respect. In cases when teachers get emotionally involved with a student, it can be said that is unfair to everyone involved – you, them, and your peers. A lot of us, through various films and beliefs believe that the romantic notion that “love will conquer all” has led many a student to do reckless things – dangerous things – which ultimately does not end well.

We need to know another important thing and that is: It’s also important to remember that the emotional aspect of feelings of love are created in an environment that is not equal. No student is a peer to his or her teacher. A student may be attracted to the intelligence, confidence, and charisma of the teacher, but that is not an interpersonal relationship, it’s not one of peers or equals.

What has been confirmed by research is that once the class is over, and the semester is over and students move on, they often find that those feelings they had fade, disappear altogether, or transfer somewhere else. They find that the emotions during the regular class simply don’t remain sustained over time. What we can conclude is that having emotions is not wrong – and no one can convince you in that. But you have to know how to control these emotions, because that mean everything.

This is a great book to be sure to read to understand exactly what love is: What Love Is: And What It Could Be

How to Avoid falling In Love With Teacher?

Some people have a tendency to fall in love very quickly and, on occasions, this means great disappointments. This can be very dangerous, especially if that person is your teacher. Regardless of whether is your teacher or someone your age, the causes of falling in love are almost identical. To consider in a short period of time that someone is the love of our life is a serious mistake and it is even more so when this happens too often. We can believe in love at first sight, but that is not enough, but there are more factors that will make us fall in love with another person. Things you need to learn is to learn to differentiate the fact of being in love with someone, having a friend, work partner or any other effective bond.

Falling in love requires time and knowing the other person thoroughly, and you can’t have that with your teacher. Sometimes, we feel alone, we are fond of a person and we consider ourselves to be in love, but it does not have to be that way. In this way, people in love try to avoid disappointment, but the truth is that we must  not convince ourselves that there are no defects in him or her, we all have them. Fear of being alone is another factor that can lead to being too enamored. You must learn to take care of yourself and not depend on another person. Likewise, your true love will come when it has to come. In this way, you will avoid creating false hopes and that your surroundings believe that you have finally found a stable partner.

3 Signs Your Teacher Likes You

1st Sign: Let’s you sit where ever you want
Its easy to notice, and it’s when they let you sit whenever you want. I know some teachers don’t let all the students aware if they want. If you were in school (and I suppose you are), you know that some teachers doens’t like some kids, while some like. When one of the students asks if she can sit anywhere, the teacher allows him. But when that same question ask a student who teacher don’t like, the answer is no. So that’s the first part of how you know if your teacher likes you.

2st Sign: Uses every opportunity to talk with you
Use every opportunity to call you in front of the board and try to establish communication with you. During class, he often turns attention and has eye contact with you. He will not warn you, even if you talk to a colleague. Sometimes he is interest for your private life and things that have nothing to do with the lessons on the class. This is the second most common indication that he wants something with you.

3rd Sign: Uses every contact opportunity
He uses the opportunity to touch you whenever it arrives. He is trying to correct you, and every time you make a mistake, he tries to establish light contact with hands that are natural and are not being noticed by class. He calls you for consultation or asks you to stay a little longer after the end of the class and as an alibi he uses instructions to help you with that subject. This sign is one of the safest indicators that your teacher want something with you, and that he is flirting with you. If you want to break it down in a decent way, you simply act disinterested.

CONCLUSION

To the question can you date your high school teacher after you graduate in short lines is yes! But what’s most important when we look at this perspective is how much the age difference is between teacher and the student. We explained that a 22 years old teacher who is dating an 18-year-old ex student is nothing strange in today’s world, but when you have an older teacher, and he is dating an 18-year-old woman, there will be surely glances, comments, and plenty of gossip around the school and inside the classroom. What is equally important to note is that this teacher will be subjected to observation by competent institutions which will create additional stress to the teacher.

Related Topic:
Are College Students Allowed to Date Professors?

Learn More

If you are interested in learning more about dating, then consider checking out this book about dating on Amazon.